On wednesday we went to the wilton museum to look at an exhibition, it was very interesting to see the different types of artists. i found it quite hard to wrap my head around some of the art. I felt frustrated that i was not as open to the work i was looking at as i would have liked to be. The only one i connected with was Siobhan O'Hehir's Yellow song. She told us about some of her work and how there was a loneliness to them, but not necessarily in a bad way but that landscapes were very therapeutic for her. When she said this i thought about what landscapes are like for me, i get an over whelming sense of freedom, but also a sense of feeling small, like i am just a speck of dust in the galaxy. That is the only way i can explain how that exhibition made me feel. very very small but with a sense of freedom. looking at other artists work with my classmates and tutors made me feel very lost, which is strange because obviously i have been to other exhibitions before. I think what i am trying to express is i am new to this massive world of art, and seeing all these different types of art and trying to make sense of them was really exhausting for me. I was trying to find one i like, but the truth is i didn't like any of them, maybe because i am too new to understand or maybe a genuinely did not connect with any of them i don't know. i know that i am allowed to say i did not like them and that ok because art is subjective. it is just very overwhelming.
When i was a kid, i got asked to produce a drawing that expressed Autumn, the winner got the work in a calendar for the school. I worked and i worked on this drawing, expressing my feelings of Autumn. I won. I told my Mum and Dad that they could buy the calendar with my work in it, i was so proud. I showed my parents my work, and although they were happy for me told me they that although it was good, my sister's new drawing of a bird was better... more realistic. Through out all of my childhood and teenage years, i was told i was not as good as my sister and to this day i still do. I would constantly compare my work to hers, and eventually i gave up art completely. I had a pang of jealousy when i would see other peoples art work, and suppress the jealous feeling towards my sister and the anger i felt towards my parents. I felt even more guilt and as i grew i built up this wall around myself, i put on a mask of a confident girl, who did not feel jealousy, sadness or frustrat...
Comments
Post a Comment